You know those moments in life that go wrong and you just hate at the time, but then you look back on them later and you laugh your head off?
Last week was one of those weeks. Everything that could go wrong did. Well, pretty much everything.
First, when I was in class on Monday, we were preparing all of our foods and had just started cooking when all of a sudden the electricity goes out. The lights went out, the hood went out (the thing that gets rid of the heat from all the stoves, ovens, steamers, pots, etc.) and even the gas went out. It was actually kind of funny.
So we waited for about fifteen minutes or so and decided that the electricity wasn't going to be coming back on any time soon, and since it's against the law to continue cooking in a commercial kitchen without any electricity, and since we couldn't exactly use anything anyway, we decided to start packing up.
But of course, an hour later, as we were literally walking out the door, the electricity comes back on. We all stopped, looked at each other and busted out laughing all at once. My teacher just shook his head and told us to go home.
Then on Wednesday I was driving to class. I had the music cranked up and I was jammin. Then I heard a beep. Just a beep. Normally when there's a beep, that means either I have to get the oil changed, I need more windshield washer fluid, or more recently the coolant is low. But, usually when it's any of those things, the little screen up top tells me so. There was nothing on the screen.
I kept driving. Then a shadow passed onto my dashboard and I saw a red light that said "Check Gauges". I've been told that when there is a red light I'm supposed to pull over and call one of my parents. But they never told me what to do when that red light says "Check Gauges".
So I called my mom, and as I was talking to her my eyes drifted over to the battery gauge. And it was definitely not where it was supposed to be. The little dial is supposed to pointing in the middle telling me that the battery is fully charged. It wasn't. It was pointing to the left, getting ever closer to the red line that I'm pretty sure means something bad. I told her about it and she said that she was going to call my dad and have him call me.
So I kept driving. And watching the little dial creep ever closer to the red line. Then it touched the red line. Then it went into the red line. And kept going.
My dad called me and I told him everything that was going on. And still, even as I'm talking to him, the little dial kept moving. By this point it was now in the middle of the red line. Closer to the farthest point left that it could go than it was to the middle where it was supposed to be.
My dad tells me that the jeep is about to die on me. Luckily I decided to go the way that takes me past the garage on my way to school. So I turn onto the road and start chugging along, patting the dash and saying "Don't die. Don't die. Don't die." I turned off the radio way back when I was telling my mom what was going on, but I decided that I should probably turn off the heat also.
And of course I had to stop at two very long stop lights. I mean, what kind of emergency would it have been if I didn't have any inconveniences on the way?
...One that didn't give me a heart attack...
After the first light I had to shove the gas pedal so close to the floor just to get going. I looked in my rear view mirror and saw this huge semi fast approaching so I put my hazard lights on. I heard the blinker noise but I didn't see the actually arrows flashing on my dash, which is when I realized that all of my lights were out. The clock, the odometer, the compass and temperature, and I'm assuming my hazard and brake lights also. Fantastic. Not only was I only going thirty with the pedal to the floor, but also the semi had no way of knowing that I was in trouble or even when I was going to slow down.
So after the second light, which at the point the pedal was literately smashed to the floor, I crept along the road going about twenty, turned into the garage parking lot without slowing down and coasted into a parking spot.
Then my jeep lurched. Unexpectedly and with such force that I had to slam on the brakes to avoid hitting the car in the space next to mine. All of the lights came back on, and the dial on the battery gauge, which had been at the farthest point left that it could possibly get, zoomed back towards the middle and just sat there, like "Hey, what's up?"
I just stared at it. I really wanted to punch it, but I figured that probably wouldn't do anything. So instead I called my dad, who answered "It died, didn't it?" Haha, nope. He showed up twenty minutes later, we went inside and explained what happened, and was told that the alternator had stopped working. It had to be replaced and so did the battery, which I had pretty much toasted trying not to die the whole way there.
Yup. I was late for class, but other than that my Wednesday was pretty uneventful.
Then on Friday my mom and I went into town early to drop my sisters off at school. We stayed in town because we had to pick up the jeep at 10 so we went and got breakfast. At one point I reached for my phone but then realized that I had left it in the truck. Then later, we went to get the jeep and as we were walking in I reached for my phone again and again realized that it was in the truck. I made a mental note to grab it before I left for class.
I should have learned by now that making mental notes to myself DO NOT work!!! (Remember when I wrote about it?) Yeah...
I was on my way to Walmart twenty minutes later (to kill sometime before class, plus they were selling their crew neck sweatshirts for $3!!! I had to get me some!) when I again realized that my phone was in the truck! My exact thought was this: "Dang it! I need to call mom and ask her if she could bring it to me." Two seconds later: "Oh wait, I can't. She has my phone."
I think I thought that like three times in that exact order. I considered intercepting her on her way home, but then I just figured that I could get it from her when we met up at church later that day. So I kept going to Walmart.
But as I pulled into the parking space at Walmart I looked over and realized that I had left every one of my school bags in the truck. Now I really did have to go find her. Luckily as I was about to leave she drove in so I didn't have to go look very far :)
I get in the truck and she's like, "Why didn't you answer your phone? I called you like ten times!"
Wait, what? I didn't have my phone. I had left it in the truck.
To make another long story short...(sorry about that first one, by the way) I lost my phone. We traveled back across town to where we had eaten and it wasn't there. We decided that it must have fallen on the running board and fallen off somewhere in on the road. It was a sad day. I don't like going anywhere without my phone. It makes me feel small and alone and with no way to contact anyone.
Then later that night, as I was watching a bunch of little kids in the child care at church, my sister walks in and hands me her phone. My friends Sarah is on and tells me that some lady just called her on my phone and told her that it was at some liquor store.
So in the end, I found my phone, well somebody else did and for whatever reason took into the liquor store where I have never been before in my life. (I promise! I'm underage for goodness sake!)
Sorry this was so long, but it's kinda hard to shorten it and get the same thing across. At the time when all these things were happening I didn't find them funny at all (well, except the first one when the electricity went out during class), but now I find them quite funny and I like to share them with people to brighten up their days. :)
I hope I made you laugh today!
